Home
so let me go & just listen...
"Someone else telling you what you're living for,
Been knocking you down: now you're looking for more.
And the only sound you hear is a closing door,
Been looking for peace, but they're bringing you war."
- Sam Roberts

"We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time."
- T. S. Eliot from "Four Quartets"
In the year of 2005 A.D.:
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930
Jun. 9th, 2005 @ 01:59 am Far too long have I waited for such an occasion to arise from the depths of self-discovery...
I am: happy
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
19 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
Jun. 8th, 2005 @ 11:13 am *lost in translation
I am: confused
I keep having these dreams ---
and I don't know what do make from them.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
Jun. 4th, 2005 @ 05:45 pm *lost in translation
I look at those words and
remember
how they used to apply to me.
And how I sit here,
seemingly unfulfilled of any
passion or
realness -
And try to justify the woman
the girlfriend
the 'for now' girl
I have become.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
1 comment
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 31st, 2005 @ 03:09 pm 1 wedding and a funeral...
Ugh, my phone beeped at 9 am. Voicemail from Mom. Laying in bed listening, she says, "I've got some bad news." My cat died this morning. Horrible, just horrible. It was 4 in the morning and there was nothing my mom could do for her. She died in so much pain, ...and I don't know how I can handle that.

So I called Mom back while I'm driving/she's at work. I asked her what happened and she said that since there was nothing she could do for her, she just...sat with my cat and talked with her until she died. There was a silence on the phone, and then we just blurted out crying. LOL, she was at work. Meanwhile, I'm sitting in traffic hoping people next to me aren't wondering why I'm crying. I've been crying all day. My little kitten I got when I was 7 is gone. I just can't believe it.

The burial is in about 45 minutes in Farmington Hills at my grandparents' house where all the family cats are buried in the woods. We're supposed to eat afterwords, but I don't know how well that is going to work out, considering that I'll end up just crying through dinner.

Ugh, it's been a rough week. There's so much going on, and I thank God I was able to talk to Chris last night to save my sanity. He seriously is such a blessing. He understands everything and he listens to me when I'm on my last limb. And after the other conversation I had last night, I needed that. I need Chris. Thus, I'm so glad we're good friends.

Random entry, but whatev.

Just breathe,
Florida in 5 days!
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
11 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 31st, 2005 @ 10:42 am *lost in translation
You're standing on your front porch
yelling at me
telling me you don't know what I want
while I'm on my bed
spilling out my troubles to you
that go in one ear
and totally
out the other-
I'm drowning in change,
gasping beneath the wet face.
So stop the perversion
the trickery
the false games
oh god, because I wish I could play the same back.
I'm not sitting around
standing up to you
waiting on my ass
trying to figure out
if you're going to fall for me
for any breath longer.
I have enough to worry about, much less you.

You're an insult to what I deserve.

What solace can a stone be for screeching nails?
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 30th, 2005 @ 11:19 pm *lost in translation
Listen to me,
and read between the
veins
throbbing
to my heart
dispersing
energy to the brain
so that I can formulate
every
synedoche
to leave you hanging
and unsure
of who you're
falling for.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 28th, 2005 @ 10:44 pm --- internship update ---
I am: ecstatic
Just listen: Fighter - Christina Aguilera

Someone pinch me.  I was just selected to be the USA delegate for an international internship for the North Sea (Germany) eco-tourism project for August, 2005.  (jumps up and down)

Dates:

6/5/05-7/29/05: NWSA Conference, Sierra Club in St. Petersburg, Florida

7/31/05-8/4/05: Dearborn, Michigan (moving into Albion, too)

8/5/05-8/21/05: Hamburg/North Sea, Germany (an die Nord See, Deutschland!)

8/22/05: First day of sophomore year, Albion

Man, too much excitement for one night!!  Darlene was like, "I have a good feeling about this Germany internship..."  She was right!! :)

(slackjawed) WOW! 

Friends, I will heartily miss you.  Come visit and pay homages in Florida. =)

information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
7 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 27th, 2005 @ 06:57 pm ...home
I am: bouncy
Ah man, just got back about an hour ago from MSU. Time to update my resume! TPL was awesome...and I'm definitely running for office.

Back in Michigan for about a week. June 3-4 is the YDA Spring National Conference and I've got to get a charter together for the Albion chapter. On June 5, Catherine and I are headed to FL and stopping in SC overnight with my favorite Chris. We arrive on the 6th in Palm Harbor, chill for few, and then head to Orlando for the conference. On the 13th, Catherine is flying home and I start work on the 14th at the Sierra Club. I've got to get a cable internet line installed down there this week and also see if the Ford dealerships can fax me their applications. Yay for being semi-independent! I have to e-mail the lady in charge of the Germany internship tomorrow; I need to figure out my plans for August. Hella good time.

So Mom was talking to my great-grandma's late sister's granddaughter's best friend (I'm not lying here) who is a paralegal for an environmental lawyer at the Ren Cen in Detroit. She's supposed to be calling me this week to set up an internship for next summer with their law firm (Pepperdine..something/something). Yay!! Hopefully I can put in some campaign time for Stabenow, too.

As far as education: I'm somewhat split between a master's in urban planning or a master's in enviro science/public policy. AAAAAAAH. 3 years will help me decide.

Time to rest, unwind, and unpack. Ten days until Florida!
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
3 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 25th, 2005 @ 10:04 pm More later...
I am: tired AND ditzy
So, in case this is some fleeting passion ...errr, something:
I'm running for the Michigan Senate. Obviously not now. Or like in 10 years. But you know, sometime after that.

Rubbing shoulders and kissing campaign managers (smacks forehead),
Catherine
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
2 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 23rd, 2005 @ 07:39 pm -- INTERNSHIP --
I am: ecstatic
Just listen: Michelle Branch

Exciting news! I'm working for the Sierra Club in the St. Petersburg, Florida, offices for the summer from June 12 until July 29. Dad said that if I get the position in Germany, I can do both internships!!!

HOW amazing!! I'm living at our condo in Tampa, so you all are welcome to come vacation!

Thus, I only have TWO more weeks left in Michigan. YAY!

(all smiles) ...FINALLY!! =)

 

I'm packing my bags because I don't want to be the only who's drowning in their misery -

And I'll take that chance because I just want to breathe,

And I won't look back and wonder how it's 'supposed' to be.

- Michelle Branch

information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
5 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 22nd, 2005 @ 10:42 am *lost in translation
I am: awake
Just listen: Comfortable - John Mayer
Oh, and I made the decision (although it hasn't fully sunk in yet) that I'm going to get my Masters in enviro sciences and public policy and THEN go to law school. That makes my life SO much easier. SO much less stressed out.

US News and Reports just released the best enviro law schools. Luckily, Stanford, Duke, and Georgetown all covet the last places on the list. All of the good ones are familiar to me for enviro reasons (i.e.: Pace University is third; Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. - the face of environmentalism in the celebrity/political circuit teaches there --- yet, none of the girls in the car with me had even heard of Pace and were all law-school bound) but definitely can-dos. We'll see what the rankings are 5 years from now.

Ok, now I should really begin the day.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 22nd, 2005 @ 10:35 am *lost in translation
I am: nervous
Ah!! Florida 2 weeks from today!! =)

Good times ahead:
6/3-6/4: YDA Conference in Detroit
6/5-6/14: NWSA Conference in Orlando...with pit stops in South Carolina and Tampa
6/15: MSU Michigan Economic Conference

Today will be filled with applying for jobs (ugh, because I still haven't heard back about Germany) and a good time out getting a manicure. It's been a rough week and I deserve pampering. Or so I am trying to convince myself.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
1 comment
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 17th, 2005 @ 11:38 pm *lost in translation
I wish,
I just wish
that eventually
someone will see
the greatness
the good
take a chance
on me.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 13th, 2005 @ 06:24 pm *lost in translation
My hair just keeps getting shorter and shorter. I love it. It's sooo choppy and screams for pomade. This definitely defines me as an English major. The ladies at the salon were like, "She's SO cute...Oh, Elle Woods." That's right: Donna likes to brag that I went to Harvard. Oh well!

DON'T go see "House of Wax." It's really dumb. However, I really want to see "Monster in Law." HELLO Michael Vartan. You're 40 - and I want you.

I had a dream I got into Brown - and I woke up and was so happy. And then I REALLY woke up and realized it was a dream. It's ok: I'm not getting in so it is just that: a dream.

Still waiting to hear about the Germany internship. I am getting ansy!

I am really excited for the honorary leadership program at State. ...I can't believe that's on Sunday --- and I can't believe today is Friday! The week disappears when you sleep the day away...

Must pick up hott Express pants from the tailor's tomorrow.

Dinner is served --- and life's just getting interesting. Hello, summer!! :)
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
6 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 13th, 2005 @ 02:30 am *lost in translation
You're broken in two;
She doesn't see it.
Held together by some expensive glue;
She doesn't feel it.
Right, wrong, and everything in between;
I can't mend your bleeding scars.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 9th, 2005 @ 12:02 am *lost in translation
Subsequential
coincidental
confidental
love.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 6th, 2005 @ 03:18 pm Mother's Day...
I am: exanimate
Just listen: Hollaback Girl - Gwen Stephani
So I attempted to simply sign a Mother's Day card for my mother that was INSANELY perfect - talking about how I treasure our times together and her - and just broke down. In the same breath, I love and hate what my life has become.

Applied for Germany internship today. If I go, I'll be collecting corophium for Dr. McCurdy while I'm there. Holla for tiny invertebrates!
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 3rd, 2005 @ 03:16 am *lost in translation
So Mother's Day is coming up...

Do I celebrate it with a woman who has been utterly distant from me when I needed her most?

Yes, because I am sucker.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
2 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
May. 2nd, 2005 @ 04:22 pm *lost in translation
I am: thankful
I sit here, writing my 402 paper, floored. To think of my life a year ago: where I was, what I was doing, what were my biggest concerns. Would I have ever envisioned who I have become? What I would do this year? Absolutely not. If you would have told me on day one that I would date that boy and become sisters with that girl, I would have called you crazy. To think about SOAR. About the people who have left Albion. About the people who have come. To think about all that I didn't know about being alone in the world - and yet, being more surrounded by people than I ever have been in years past. To think of the books I've read. The papers I've written. The thought of 'I'm never pulling an all-nighter.' The simplicity that was high school and complexity that is now life. The bonds that have strengthened, regardless of how far away friends are. The realization that I do miss my family. The days that built upon days of constant work, always feeling like there was no finish line in sight. The brisk walks across the quad. The ice storms, the snow storms, the rain storms, the hail storms. The dust that covers Lilo at the Dow. The talks with Gouldey over dorm-brewed Starbucks coffee that last until 6:45 am. The hugs received from people when I really needed 'It'll be okay's. The laughs with friends and professors. The good, the bad, and the ugly. The beautiful, the irreplaceable. The procastination, the research, and the execution. The idea of writing long papers over night. The inbetween that keeps you coming back for more. The seniors, the seniors.

The bare walls and worn carpeting. Words cannot express what this year has meant.
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
2 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link
Apr. 30th, 2005 @ 06:26 pm *lost in translation
"Today, we salute you, Miss Sorority Girl. In your pointed-stilettos, you understand that having blisters and cramped pinky toes is a small price to pay for the approval of your sisters. Sure, your Vera Bradley bag and oversized pearls may appear to have been stolen from your grandmother, but we rest assured that your Daddy bought them for you fair and square. And yes, you may be snobby to every guy that approaches you, but we know that you're only doing them a favor by helping them understand that they are in fact gay. So crack open an ice-cold Diet Coke, Sorority Girl, because everyone knows that behind your dyed blonde hair and falsely tanned skin there sits a real person in the driver seat of that Lexus SUV, and that real person...is a pale brunette." (posted compliments of Miss Erin at MSU, Pi Beta Phi)

"You are only as strong as the cocktails you drink, the tables you dance on, and the girlfriends that hold you up."
information
Going out to Pleasure Island, FL
7 comments
Leave a comment
Permanent Link